Yesterday in the office:

- 'So - what are you doing on Valentine's that is so special?' 
- [colleague who's previously tried to convince me Valentine's Day is a good thing] 'You know. Try to make an effort. Like be pleasant all day.'

Such a charmer.

Social interaction at work is so!freakin'!awkward!

Because I am a skillful master of day-to-day corporate encounters, I felt it was necessary to put together this thorough step by step guide on how to survive these situations.

You are welcome.

Step 1
Morning. Pick up your cup and go to the coffee/ water machine.
Step 2
Fill said cup.
Step 3
[There is now at least one person behind you. Do not panic] Turn around. Person will look at you. 
Step 4
It is time for your performance. While keeping a blank stare, turn the corners of your lips upwards. Do not break into a smile! You need to keep things professional, so continue to purse your lips extremely tight. Raise your eyebrows in surprise while keeping the blank stare and your lips tight.
Step 5
[internal scream]
Step 6
Relax facial muscles. Leave the place. 

Rinse and repeat.

Who needs to be creative when there are onesies and pizza in the world?!
[And they all lived happily ever after]