- 'So - what are you doing on Valentine's that is so special?'
- [colleague who's previously tried to convince me Valentine's Day is a good thing] 'You know. Try to make an effort. Like be pleasant all day.'
Such a charmer.
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Yesterday in the office:
- 'So - what are you doing on Valentine's that is so special?' - [colleague who's previously tried to convince me Valentine's Day is a good thing] 'You know. Try to make an effort. Like be pleasant all day.' Such a charmer.
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Social interaction at work is so!freakin'!awkward!
Because I am a skillful master of day-to-day corporate encounters, I felt it was necessary to put together this thorough step by step guide on how to survive these situations. You are welcome. Step 1 Morning. Pick up your cup and go to the coffee/ water machine. Step 2 Fill said cup. Step 3 [There is now at least one person behind you. Do not panic] Turn around. Person will look at you. Step 4 It is time for your performance. While keeping a blank stare, turn the corners of your lips upwards. Do not break into a smile! You need to keep things professional, so continue to purse your lips extremely tight. Raise your eyebrows in surprise while keeping the blank stare and your lips tight. Step 5 [internal scream] Step 6 Relax facial muscles. Leave the place. Rinse and repeat. Who needs to be creative when there are onesies and pizza in the world?!
[And they all lived happily ever after] |
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December 2016
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